Post Mortem: My Catalyst

I have been thinking about my failure with my catalyst, the one who started it all for me by infecting me with the horrible disease known as one-itis. The positive of this perfect failure was that I got into the game and the community, and I'm dedicating my entire next six months to pure gaming. The negative of this failure was that I lost one girl who I truly think beats out all of my previous girlfriends in terms of how she compared against my checklist of the ideal girlfriend.

I started out communication with her through e-mail (I was set up through a relative of hers). I used words to demonstrate high value without really knowing it; all I did was talk about my travels and this completely enchanted her. I met her at a baseball game with her relative (for comfort) but the moment I saw her, I was floored by her beautiful blue eyes. They literally stopped time for me, which has never happened before. I was completely nervous with her, but by chance she contacted me afterward and asked for my phone number. I was still confused as to whether she wanted to date or just hang out (it turns out they are the same).

We ended up going to a movie together and had a really great time, but I violated one of the rules of pickup: supplication. I bought the tickets and the dinner (even though it was just cheap pizza). I was completely nervous at dinner and have no idea how our conversation completed. The movie was a lot of fun and I was really just being my normal funny self. During the film she commented how funny we both were together, and immediately I had an urge to grab her hand, but as an AFC I resisted. In hindsight this was a major IOI and I should have jumped on this opportunity.

When I dropped her off, I was super nervous as she asked me what I wanted to do. She asked me to kiss her and I did, and that was it. I was so completely shocked that this amazing girl asked me to kiss her that I was stunned in AFCness.

E-mail communication immediately afterward was great, but by the time the second date came around, she was treating me like absolute crap. I don't know what happened between date 1 and date 2, but date 2 was a miserable experience. It was a double-date with her relative and his wife, so I was forced to oblige, and again I supplicated by buying dinner and her tickets. I had sealed the deal in her books, and the game was over.

I didn't really care for her much as a prospect, but I did find her an interesting friend, so I kept up communication. Then when hanging out with her as a friend, I started really developing feelings for her, which led to my real one-itis. The day after we really started having great times together without trying too hard, she met her new boyfriend and I haven't seen her since.

So that's my story. It's the story of the girl who started me down the path of the game, and I have become a better man ever since. While I may never win her back (I could... in a few months), I will at least have the skills to win the next amazing girl that crosses my path. I'm hoping right now to use the rules of pickup (if you make a girl jealous, she will become attracted to you; lead the men and the women will follow; be the alpha male) to win her back sometime around April. I don't know if I will, but hell it's worth a shot. In the meantime, I'm gaming hardcore and I'm going to cure this one-itis if it kills me. I think by the time I'm a PUA, I probably won't want to date her anymore anyway!

I wish I could have won her over as I was, but at the same time if I hadn't lost her I wouldn't have started into this whole world of self-improvement. Perhaps it was for the best?

Let's just hope she never stumbles upon this blog and reads my thoughts.