Morphine Relationships

I remember reading in the Game that Juggler commented on Style, saying how he thought Style was trying to find happiness in his life by filling a void with women. I understand that intellectually but haven't fully grasped it yet. For me, affection and love with women is so powerful and always brings me joy, but as I remember previous girlfriends now, I am starting to realize that success with women does not equate to happiness. It's hard to grasp at this stage in the game, but I do see how it will become more important down the line. One thing Style did say that the best way to pick up women is to be a legitimately happy (and of course confident) guy. So many people are unhappy and insecure but they try to fix this by getting into relationships that they think will bring them joy. This joy is, however, temporary.

Watching more On Being a Man by DavidD, he drops an important point:

Money, power, and success with women NEVER solves inner problems, and NEVER creates happiness by itself.

I look back at my previous failures with women (e.g. my one-itis) and it does bring me a smile because I realize that what I was seeking with those women was love and acceptance and maternal nurturing qualities that I lack because of my own mother's death when I was 16. So with women I am trying to find happiness, but happiness lies within. It sounds corny and trite but it's true; I just wish I knew how to get there. If only DavidD would point me in the right direction!

This goes back to my analogy for people who get into LTRs to find validation for their existence or purely to seek happiness: they have inner problems, so the affection of another brings them temporal relief. In actuality, however, this is more like giving morphine to someone dying from internal bleeding: they will feel great for a while, but it doesn't solve the inner problem. I know so many guys and girls who are in, what I like to call, "morphine relationships."