Jiminy Cricket
I've posted recently about how I'm still worried about entering the community. How will this change me? How will it affect my existing network of friends? How will it affect my work? There are many members of the community who are quite sketchy and downright nasty; these men often use their powers for evil (i.e. as much sex as possible with as many women as possible).
After careful consideration and listening to my conscience, I can safely proclaim that this is success-decisive for my life. I've been following my Jiminy Cricket religiously for the past six months or so, and never has he led me astray yet. Right now he's telling me to enter the community and practice regularly. I don't know if we'll build a Project house out here in my city like they have in Los Angeles, but I would be very interested in meeting other PUAs in this area.
But why is this so damn important? Numerous reasons come to mind. I've tried to get better at talking with women just by being happier and more myself, but it seems small rejections or bad conversations return me to my normal AFC state. In general, I have never really known how to hold a good conversation with a girl with whom I have sexual interest. It's like I talk to them and my mind just goes away, forcing me to ask boring interview questions.
But I think the most important reason I want to do this comes back to something Style said in the book (again, I truly identify with Style so far). He says that every man's life is divided into two areas: success with his career/ambition/goals and success with pleasure/enjoyment/women. Men are constantly plagued by our desires to push ahead and succeed in this rat race we call America, and we're also permanently plagued by our need for sex (and even love) -- and this latter problem affects us no matter where we are. While I know I've been very successful with my career/ambition/etc. component of my life so far, and I know I will be even more successful in the future in that respect, I still feel I am a total failure with women in general. I'm not the kind of guy who always has a girlfriend or has two or three girls always pining over him. It's just not me, unfortunately, and I think the problem has only been made worse by years of this apathy by the female gender. There have been times where I have noticed interest by other women, but for various psychological reasons having to do with my upbringing, I ignore them.
Oh, I've had sex, but you can count the number of unique women on one hand. Is this a bad thing? Not necessarily--I don't really feel I need to be in the hundreds by the time I die to be proud of this, but I would like to be in the dozens. I'd like to have the experience of enjoying so many beautiful women as a reward for my hard work outside of women (i.e. on the job). I know that one day when I'm rich, this won't be a problem and women will flock towards me, but I don't want to sit around waiting that many years with only my hand to keep me happy. It's pathetic! I mean why shouldn't women be flocking all over me? I'm not a bad looking guy, I make great money, and I'm fun to be around, dammit! But as my cousin's girlfriend pointed out, I really just have very little confidence around women. It's not that I'm scared of them, but I just have had so many bad experiences that it's destroyed that area of my life, and entering the community may be my only cure.
I look at a role model of mine at work and know that I want to live his life. He's now over 40, married to a beautiful woman, and he has two fantastic children. His wife is an awesome mom and a wonderful cook, and he has sculpted himself a very cozy existence where we work. He socializes with high-level players in the company and golfs with his boss. In short, his life is great with no problems. That's what I want, but I fear this insecurity that has been plaguing me for six years now (I judge my starting point at age 18 when my first girlfriend dumped me), and I don't see it going away any time soon. Rather than sitting back and taking this abuse, I'm going to be proactive (i.e. alpha) and make a difference in my life. If that means becoming a PUA, then so be it.
My only real worry is disease. If you hook up with enough women, even kissing, you are bound to get something that might stick with you for the rest of your life (herpes would be the least of your worries). Just imagine being 25 and having HIV--your whole life is ruined because you had to have too much fun with too many women. How are you going to ever have a family when you've got AIDS? Fortunately, I figure I can avoid these problems by being very careful with protection and selection, too. As Van Wilder says in his movie:
After careful consideration and listening to my conscience, I can safely proclaim that this is success-decisive for my life. I've been following my Jiminy Cricket religiously for the past six months or so, and never has he led me astray yet. Right now he's telling me to enter the community and practice regularly. I don't know if we'll build a Project house out here in my city like they have in Los Angeles, but I would be very interested in meeting other PUAs in this area.
But why is this so damn important? Numerous reasons come to mind. I've tried to get better at talking with women just by being happier and more myself, but it seems small rejections or bad conversations return me to my normal AFC state. In general, I have never really known how to hold a good conversation with a girl with whom I have sexual interest. It's like I talk to them and my mind just goes away, forcing me to ask boring interview questions.
But I think the most important reason I want to do this comes back to something Style said in the book (again, I truly identify with Style so far). He says that every man's life is divided into two areas: success with his career/ambition/goals and success with pleasure/enjoyment/women. Men are constantly plagued by our desires to push ahead and succeed in this rat race we call America, and we're also permanently plagued by our need for sex (and even love) -- and this latter problem affects us no matter where we are. While I know I've been very successful with my career/ambition/etc. component of my life so far, and I know I will be even more successful in the future in that respect, I still feel I am a total failure with women in general. I'm not the kind of guy who always has a girlfriend or has two or three girls always pining over him. It's just not me, unfortunately, and I think the problem has only been made worse by years of this apathy by the female gender. There have been times where I have noticed interest by other women, but for various psychological reasons having to do with my upbringing, I ignore them.
Oh, I've had sex, but you can count the number of unique women on one hand. Is this a bad thing? Not necessarily--I don't really feel I need to be in the hundreds by the time I die to be proud of this, but I would like to be in the dozens. I'd like to have the experience of enjoying so many beautiful women as a reward for my hard work outside of women (i.e. on the job). I know that one day when I'm rich, this won't be a problem and women will flock towards me, but I don't want to sit around waiting that many years with only my hand to keep me happy. It's pathetic! I mean why shouldn't women be flocking all over me? I'm not a bad looking guy, I make great money, and I'm fun to be around, dammit! But as my cousin's girlfriend pointed out, I really just have very little confidence around women. It's not that I'm scared of them, but I just have had so many bad experiences that it's destroyed that area of my life, and entering the community may be my only cure.
I look at a role model of mine at work and know that I want to live his life. He's now over 40, married to a beautiful woman, and he has two fantastic children. His wife is an awesome mom and a wonderful cook, and he has sculpted himself a very cozy existence where we work. He socializes with high-level players in the company and golfs with his boss. In short, his life is great with no problems. That's what I want, but I fear this insecurity that has been plaguing me for six years now (I judge my starting point at age 18 when my first girlfriend dumped me), and I don't see it going away any time soon. Rather than sitting back and taking this abuse, I'm going to be proactive (i.e. alpha) and make a difference in my life. If that means becoming a PUA, then so be it.
My only real worry is disease. If you hook up with enough women, even kissing, you are bound to get something that might stick with you for the rest of your life (herpes would be the least of your worries). Just imagine being 25 and having HIV--your whole life is ruined because you had to have too much fun with too many women. How are you going to ever have a family when you've got AIDS? Fortunately, I figure I can avoid these problems by being very careful with protection and selection, too. As Van Wilder says in his movie:
You should always check the quality of the field before you step out onto the turf. Don't be a fool; wrap your tool.Amen, brother.
posted by Van Wilder @ 11:43 PM
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